Ask Giant Minecraft Dyer #5: Football Manager

Some fucking absolute media ponce got me on the blower and started mugging me off with questions about PC games.

Thinking about needlessly dropping all my hard earned on the new Championship Manager: Spreadsheet Edition loot crate. Should I?” – @twotafkap

The Dyer

Look.  I love football as much as the next geezer.  I’ve been to almost 23 football matches and I’m best known for playing Thomas ‘Tommy’ Bickleswaite in the film ‘Footy Fugz’ (now streaming on Crackle).

I love nuffin more than going to White Hart Park and watching my beloved West Hamwich on a Saturday afternoon but playing fucking football management games?

How does one quantify the heterogeneous characteristics of the modern football professional using an arbitrary scoring system based on values of twenty or less?  LIKE A FUCKING SERIAL NONCEOPHILE IS HOW.

Football ain’t about numbers.  It’s about having a right fucking tear up with Millwall when it’s all about to come on top and all you’ve got is a pool cue and your fucking bollocks.  50,000 of them.  Ten of us.  All top boys.

Anyway, here’s a video of Jasper Sutcliffe’s winning goal in the 1985 Spandex Cup.


Social Media REACH dot ORG

Oh no!  Rather short-sightedly, when we ended PEOWW last time around –  #flouncekingz – we gave up our Twitter handle.  @peoww is super exclusive much like having a phone number made of nothing but threes.

Well, the Chinese own that now.  But we’re back with @peowwUK and this time we cannot be stopped by anything apart from our own APATHY.


It was ten years ago today…

… Sergeant PEOWWster told the world what was up with this god damned games industry.  We burned bright for five years before imploding.  We retreated back into our shell plotting our revenge against the games industry that killed our families and left us disfigured.

We came back two years later for a “bonus month of unfuckwittable content ™” just to remind the games industry that we’re still here, watching.  From beyond them trees.

And now it is November 2017.  Ten years after we first put the site together.  So it’s time for another bonus month of unfuckwittable content ™.  PEOWW:  not the heroes the games industry wants but the ones it deserves.  It’s on.

It's-a-me! Mario!